All Change

I've been a little quieter than usual around here. There's been a lot going on. I've hinted at it here and there, but I haven't really said anything about it. Not all of the roller coaster dips and dives were related to it anyway. There were a couple of illnesses in the family that, threw us all for a loop, but thankfully things are much better in that regard. In a way the illnesses helped me focus on what was really important and this point I'm about to get to, paled into insignificance for a while.


But now, my head and my hours are filled with thoughts of the future. I keep getting waves of bubbling excitement in my stomach and at other times the nausea of anxiety roils.

I finished my day-job today. 

I have been made redundant.

It's a funny thing, to type that. That word 'redundant' has such strong connotations. 

Redundant: Not or no longer needed or useful; superfluous. No longer in employment because there is no more work available.

Except that none of that is true. The one and only reason that I will be unemployed, for the first time in 13 years, is that the government has made a very uneducated decision to cut our funding. That's all. There's still plenty of work to do. There's still a need for our services. Our collective experience and knowledge is still useful. And, even though, our organisation was underfunded for many, many years, and we were expected to perform miracles with buttons and pocket lint - we still ended up costing a little too much for the people crunching the numbers.

So that's annoying. And frustrating. But there is nothing more I can do about that.


Part of me is ready and excited for change and I am wondering that if I hadn't been pushed, would I have ever made the leap... or just continued clinging the safety net of a steady paycheck.

There is a whole blank slate before me now. I can reinvent myself entirely. I can take some time out. Decide what I'd like to be or what I'd like to do. I mostly enjoy change and adapt well to new situations and, deep down, I know, as much as anyone can really know what the future will hold, that things will be ok.


Another part of me is nervous. I haven't not worked in a long, long time. We have a mortgage. I have children that are still in preschool. They have done their free ECCE year but I've decided to wait another year before sending them to big school, so this year will need to be paid for. Our boiler is pretty ancient and will need replacing at some point. Our car is in a similar state... All of these practical necessities will need money. And, for the moment, it's unclear where this money will come from.


I feel like I had a great practice run of living on less last year, when I took five months unpaid parental leave. I adored being at home and didn't mind the frugality it required in the least. In a way, I had the freedom to enjoy it because the safety net of the job was waiting for me. Now that safety net has been torn away and it's time to sink or swim. Sink into the depression of financial woe or swim towards the shores of infinite opportunities.

I choose to swim.

28 comments

  1. How flippin' exciting! Sometimes the most incredible changes happen when we are pushed, because the change is so huge, we would have never taken the plunge. I am really looking forward to seeing your next chapter unfold :)

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    1. It IS exciting isn't it! I just have to get my mind settled so I can focus. Too many ideas swirling around right now! xxx

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  2. I have no doubt you will swim to Olympic standard! Good luck and, just like a good swimmer, remember to breath!

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    1. Thanks Naomi. A breather is exactly what I need right now.

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  3. Very exciting! Taking a break is such a great opportunity to reinvent yourself and find out how you can get paid for doing something you love, and hopefully make it work with your family as well. (At least, that's what we all want, isn't it?)

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    1. That's exactly it. Finding something you love and making it work for you. At the moment I'm mostly looking forward to the break though ;)

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  4. Choose to enjoy the adventure.
    Sometimes we have to pause (and breathe) to realise that what may seem like a series of unfortunate events may in fact be the beginning of an amazing adventure.
    Use the support around you and know that there are tons of us we have gone through the same and have emerged stronger and with a new appreciation for all that we have. Good luck.

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  5. I think there's a lot to be said for being pushed into something unexpected but potentially life-changing.
    Wishing you so much happiness and excitement and luck for this next chapter - I can't wait to read all about it xx

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    1. Thanks so much, my dear. Absolutely. It's so much easier to choose the 'safe' path. But I don't want to wake up one day and be looking back at a humdrum life. I'm looking forward to the adventure!

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  6. Best of luck, you'll fly it! Looking at it as an opportunity is the only way to go. :)

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  7. Super exciting times ahead of you. This is a great opportunity for you! I can't wait to see what unfolds for you

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    1. Thanks Gin! I'm looking forward to finding out myself!

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  8. Thats a tough day S but with your great Positive attitude I think great things lie ahead for you and yours xx

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    1. Thanks lovely. Last days are strange alright. Weird saying goodbye to the people I've spent 8 hours a day with for years and years, but I'm looking forward to the future too.

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  9. Well done on putting such a positive spin on it! And the very best of luck for an exciting future x

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  10. Damn, I had replied but it looks like it got eaten by the internet.

    I wanted to say I love your attitude and bravery. Better things are ahead for you.

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    1. Oh, sorry about that. Blogger has an annoying tendency to do that to comments :/ But thanks for coming back and for leaving this lovely message. It is much appreciated xx

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  11. You're totally going to swim Sadhbh! I completely understand your concerns about money etc. Sometimes life has a funny way of working those things out for us. I have a picture I wanted to send you but I can't stick it in the comments - I'll get it to you though! The very best of luck in the next exciting chapter of your life xxx

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    1. Thanks so much! I really appreciate your comment and LOVED the picture. Perfect xx

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  12. Exciting and scary hope the swimming is good and you don't feel you are battling the tide all the time :)

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