10 Years After


Our first date wasn't even a date, but it was the day I realised I was going to marry my husband. The revelation was mildly disconcerting at the time, because I hadn't even thought about fancying him before that. 

I'd known him for years. Since childhood really, when a gang of us 'alternative' kids would hang around outside the amusements at the end of the prom all Summer long. Devo was one of the ringleaders. I was younger than most of them and only able to infiltrate their ranks because I was with my older cousin. I think I was 12 when I first met them. I don't remember speaking to anyone other than my cousin and maybe a couple of the other girls (I was probably too in awe of the long hair and heavy metal t-shirts everyone wore to open my mouth) but I do remember Devo speaking to me. He was friendly and cheeky and a larger than life kind of character (in fairness he's 6'4" so he's pretty much larger than life in general) and I liked him. But he was WAY too old for me to even consider 'liking' in 'that' way. (He would have been 15 when I was 12 - practically a MAN)

I hung out on the beach for a few summers, maybe until I was 15, when I got heavily involved in the youth theatre I was a member of and pretty much moved into the decrepit building we rented. I didn't see much of the 'alternative' crowd for while... (not that the drama crowd were mainstream!)

Then, when I was 17 I joined a punk band that Devo had started. Mostly so I could 'get to know' the drummer... I was supposed to be a singer, but I don't recall doing any such thing... though I did hang out with the old gang quite a bit that year.

I often bumped into Devo during my college years. Mostly on buses. He was one of the few people I didn't actively try to avoid when all I wanted to do was sleep on the journey home. He was always doing interesting things, so conversations with him were always fun, regardless of how hungover tired I was. Working in art studios. Going to cool gigs. Playing cool gigs. Reading about artists. Seeing exhibitions and the latest movies. I was always impressed. But he was a MAN and I still didn't consider myself much more than a kid.

Heavy Metal was the glue that bound us in the beginning and years later it was 'alternative' music that brought Devo and I back into contact. 

You see, long before Blogs there were things called Zines. Homemade magazines; photocopied, stapled together, distributed in record stores or sold at gigs by their makers. They were (and still are) similar to blogs, in that they reflect the interests of their authors. They might have recipes or instructions on how your mend bicycle or comic strips or ecological information or book reviews or gig reviews or interviews with bands. All sorts of things really.

When I was 22, I produced a zine. Just one issue (and it took me a million years to get just that one together). It was called Ruby Fix. In it, there was a slightly xenophobic article about American students, a badly written review of a gig I was at in San Francisco, a piece about how I sneaked (snuck?) into the Burning Man festival and interviews with two bands. Devo was in one of those bands.

I had bumped into him on the street one day, for some reason mentioned I was writing a Zine and the next thing I knew we had picked a date for an interview in a local pub a few days later.

The band were all already there, pints in hand, when I arrived with my Dad's tape recorder and a crumpled sheet of scribbled questions. I was nervous and fumbled with the recorder, trying to make sure I'd actually pressed the button properly this time (the other band interview had had to be conducted twice:/)

"So" I began, and looked up at Devo who was sitting opposite me, "will we start?" 

And then, completely out of nowhere, I heard it.

The little voice in my head that said "You're going to marry him."

For a moment I just sat looking at him. As if it was the first time I had ever seen him.

And, in a way, it was.

Of course, I shook it off and continued with the interview (so professional), but the little voice was right.

A couple of months later, we went on our first proper date and three years after that I did, indeed, marry him.

Today, Devo and I celebrate our tenth wedding anniversary.

Ten years, two houses and twin children later  - it feels like forever ago. But it also feels like yesterday. 

We still talk about music and art and movies. I still look at him and know that he is the one. And, even though, there are times that are not easy and times when I wish things were as carefree as they were when we first met, I sure am glad I listened to that little voice. 

He is my best friend. My soul mate. My only love. 

My man.

Happy Anniversary, Devo x

17 comments

  1. What a beautiful post and a wonderful story. Thank you for sharing and congratulations on ten years here's to ten more!

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  2. How lovely! Congrats on 10 years and onwards to many more!

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  3. Aww such a beautiful post so full of love, happy anniversary to you both and here's to the next 10 years x

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  4. Oh the smoochy rock 'n' rollness of the pair of ye!!! Wishing you many more happy days xx

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  5. Oh, that was such a lovely read, the sure start of a novel or film in there! Congratulations, and many more years of happiness xxx

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    1. Thanks Emily! Some day I'll write my memoirs ;) But a movie would be fun too!

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  6. What a gorgeous story. I'm tearing up now. Gulp. And in awe of how cool he sounds. Congrats on your anniversary! (My 10 is coming up later this summer too! It was a good summer for weddings, even if the weather was shite.)

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    1. Oh thank you! He's pretty cool alright ;) Happy Anniversary to you too. In advance xx

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  7. What a lovely story :) Congratulations on your anniversary!!

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  8. I missed this at the time - I think I was on holidays - I AM BAWLING! That's such a gorgeous story, and so beautifully written. My toddler was calling me but I couldn't stop reading - I had to know what happened next. Belated congratulations!

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    1. Aww, thank you! Don't be bawling - it has a happy ending!!

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