The Night Before The Day

It's the eve of my little girls' first day of school. I should be in bed already but I know that if I was I probably wouldn't sleep. I should go to bed, though, because in the morning I have to get up early and get dressed and fed. And dress and feed other people. And, most importantly, get out the door on time. Because, for the first time in months, we have somewhere to be
All summer we have lounged around in the mornings. Stayed in pyjamas until whenever. Eaten breakfast in the garden and second breakfast on the sofa. We've had lazy picnics and played with friends and stayed at home when the rain came. Which it did. Quite often.

Over the past few days I've noticed the days shorten. I've been surprised, in the evening, when I've looked out the window at the darkness where, only a few weeks ago, there would have been light. I've noticed that the leaves are beginning to turn too. Green fading to gold. New suddenly old. The mist on the hills spells out Autumn-time...

or maybe

School-time.
L-R: Sábha, Lile at three-weeks-old.
I can't get an image of them as tiny newborns out of my head. They were sleeping side by side as I filled out the school application forms five and a half years ago. Their frail little bodies huddled together under a pile of blankets despite the spring warmth. I sat with the paperwork and felt ridiculous that I was even doing it. It seemed laughable that these tiny little babies would ever be going to school. It was 2010 and I was happy if I could get through one day at a time caring for my babies. 2015 was impossibly far away. Impossible to even imagine.

Except that now 2015 is here. And it arrived in the blink of an eye.

Every time I looked at my little ones today, butterflies danced in my stomach. Every time I picture them walking through the school gates tomorrow morning, in their shiny new shoes and pristine uniforms I feel hot tears pricking the back of my eyes. 

Part of me is afraid that once they've walked through those gates, I'll blink again, and in another instant they'll be grown and full of knowing things that I haven't taught them and full of teenage mystery and full of other things that, right now, are impossible to even imagine. 

But... that will be 2023. Which, tonight, seems like a ridiculous number... laughable that it will ever exist.
The inspiration for these can be found HERE
So for now, the night before the day that big school begins, I'll tuck the little love hearts I've made to comfort them into their cardigan pockets. I'll also tuck a wad of tissues into my own pockets and tomorrow morning... 

I'll kiss them and wave them off and try my hardest not to blink...

19 comments

  1. They are such perfectly gorgeous little school girls - what a lovely photo, and what a beautiful post.
    Best of luck tomorrow - it will be wonderful. But yes, do pack the tissues...

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    1. Thanks so much, Andrea. I still can't quite get my head around the fact that it's actually happening! But I know for sure there'll be tissues at the ready :)

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  2. Oh the memories are so recent. Poof! A blink of an eye and they're in Senior infants... The very best of luck to you and to the girls tomorrow. I will probably well up in our now familiar school yard if I see any hesitancy on the part of a parent or child. It's such a huge, but great milestone.

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    1. Thanks so much Jill. It went really well in the end :) Hooray!

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    2. Thanks so much Jill. It went really well in the end :) Hooray!

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  3. It's a big day for both them and you but while they will see it as the start of an adventure you will mourn the end of a very special time. Believe me though, there are many great days ahead, hilarious stories of school antics and though tomorrow will be hard, it will get easier x

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    1. Thanks Elizabeth. It's hard to let them go but, you're right and, I'm SO looking forward to the stories. My sister is a primary school teacher and always has the funniest stories to tell. I'm looking forward to my girls being a part of that!

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  4. Really big day in your house - definitely the start of a whole new adventure of learning and fun, hope it all went off without a hitch. Gorgeous pictures!

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    1. Thanks so much Lisa! (And thanks so much for linking!) It all went really well. The best possible start.

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    2. Thanks so much Lisa! (And thanks so much for linking!) It all went really well. The best possible start.

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  5. Such a beautiful post for such beautiful girls, lots and lots of luck for today.
    Nicola xxx

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    1. Thanks Nicola! Your well wishes worked and we had a great day afterall x

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    2. Thanks Nicola! Your well wishes worked and we had a great day afterall x

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  6. That is so lovely, I hope the day went really well for them x

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    1. Thanks so much. they absolutely LOVED it! Phew!

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    2. Thanks so much. they absolutely LOVED it! Phew!

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  7. So beautiful. The emotions of the first day are amazing aren't they? Excitement and trepidation (and I'm only talking about the Mummy's emotions!) I hope they loved it and still love it this week... and next.

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    1. Thanks so much Nessa. It's been unreal! But they've settled nicely now and we're all getting used to the new routine.

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    2. Sorry Neasa! I got a bit trigger-happy with the S ;)

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